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Though Facebook became something else more general, it began with the understanding that the old ways for heterosexual introductions weren’t working as well as they did before. I recall meeting lovely teenagers who went to other high schools, some nearby; but since transportation out of my insulated town was problematic until one became licensed to drive a car, these relationships didn’t develop.Once old enough to drive, I could pursue young women met at jobs we shared, such as a counselor at a summer day camp. Some of them introduced me to other women whom I dated and, in one case, married.Others asked for preferences so trivial that I doubted their intelligence about heterosexual relationships, even if their founder(s) claimed a doctorate (in Lord knows what).Those requiring no fee, such as Craig’s List, didn’t work, as I sensed more than once their appeal to single people who really wanted not to actually meet but rather desired some Internet attention, any free attention.As Zoosk thinks I reside in Ridgewood, New Jersey, rather than the less familiar Ridgewood in Queens, New York, it offers me only New Jersey woman who are too far away; and I can’t seem to recircuit their offerings for me.Were some of these inept websites really fronts for other kinds of biz?I remember noticing that women advertising in the claimed cultural sophistication, usually measured by listing artistic preferences and/or the wish to travel to exotic places (thus implicitly discouraging those unfamiliar with Picasso or Paris).
Even though I asked to find me women residing within twenty miles of me in NYC, it offered me several only in Canada.Need I add that some Right Stuff women introduced themselves to me, sometimes successfully.Through this route I met in the mid-1990s a woman I loved for several years, whom I should have met before, had the person knowing us both in the 1960s cared to introduce us.I also recall meeting a matchmaker who treated me to drinks at a midtown hotel before requesting a thousand dollars—a cool grand—for her services.Her problem was that her stable of women, by her own descriptions, didn’t include anyone I’d want to meet.
Somewhere I came across an advertisement for The Right Stuff, which promised “Ivy League of Dating,” though they expanded their scope to include alumni of other culturally classy North American colleges, such as the University of Toronto and Sarah Lawrence.